Monday, December 31, 2012
Happy 2013!!!
Happy New Year!! Wow, what a year it has been! I love this song because I can rest in the fact that whatever happens in this next year I belong to the most Amazing Man, Jesus Christ, the One that paid for my sins on the cross and who wants to you to belong to Him too!
God Bless in this New Year! <3 p="p">
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
Saturday, November 24, 2012
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Thursday, November 15, 2012
Pumpkin doughnuts
Here is an AMAZING baked, vegan, pumpkin doughnut recipe! I didn't use the egg in the recipe and for milk I used soy milk. I also baked the doughnuts a little longer than it called for. Have fun with this yummy recipe!!!!http://www.twopeasandtheirpod.com/baked-pumpkin-donut-holes/
Monday, August 27, 2012
Won't Back Down
This post is to encourage myself more than it is to be enlightening or thought provoking. The past few years have honestly been some of the hardest most heart wrenching years of my life. There has been, of course, the bright spots, the happy moments but in regards to how the overal past few years have been it has honestly felt like hell. I am not saying hell as in cursing but as in a real state of being. It has been easy to ask myself, "God, where are you?" "Why?" "I am a good person, why me, why my family!" In the Bible in the book of Job, Job had to deal with those tough questions as well. After loosing everything that was dear to him he was left to wonder what in the world was going on?
I grew up in a Seventh Day Adventist Family. My parents became Christians when I was very young. Going from weed smoking, drinking, partying lifestyles God saved our family. I am so grateful for the love, the nurture, the admonition and care of my godly parents. Without them I would not be who I am today.God saved my family from the pit of despair and bondage. I have no doubt in my mind that being a follower of Christ is what I am meant to be.
I have been a student missionary, I have been on several out of the countries short mission trips, I have held positions in the church, yet in spite of all of this I struggle. I struggle with forgiveness, I struggle with hate, I stuggle with with myself.
Several years ago my family started working with a self supporting ministry in our Church. Growing up I had very high ideals of this place. I grew up going there and the people seemed almost like saints. When I was given the opportunity to work there I was beyond happy! It seemed so wonderful. Little by little though the raw truth starting to sink in, there were huge problems with the leadership, issues being swept under the rug, myself and others were sexually harrased, workers being treated with little respect and an overal feeling that this place was farther from sainthood than I had originally had anticipated. Then my family, as other families had before us,began being treated really bad. I could not understand how people of my own church, my own religion could act as if they were not Christians. My whole family came under attack. During that time we were going through a possible cancer scare with my Mom and had little emotional support.
Eventually things worsened and my Dad was fired. My brothers had previously left working there with a bitter taste of Christianity in their mouths. After being severally mistreated over my being sexually harrased and seeing how my Dad was unfaily treated I left as well. I can't begin to tell you the bitterness and hatred that started to work its way in my heart. I wanted revenge, I hated, I hurt.
I have had to little by little give the hurt, the pain, the hatred to Christ. I cannot do it on my own. I could feel my heart grow bitter and hateful and I did not want to turn into that. It has been a few years now and the pain has lessend and with time but it is still there. I still struggle with hatred and pain but with Christ's help I keep surrendering it.
During that time some other personal things happened that brought pain to my family as well. Due to the nature of them I cannot share but it was another arrow to our hearts.
Just recently my my family had another loss. My parents foster/adopt and a baby we have had for the past 2 1/2 years was just recently returned to her birth Mom. Caring for that baby had been our highlight during the dark times of tribulation we experienced and now she too is gone.
My heart aches to write all of this but I have determined in my heart that I will not loose my hold, my trust, my anchor to Christ. He has been my all in all and the light at the end of the tunnel. Some moments I have to take them second by second but with His grace He is helping me through the trials and dark valleys of this life.
I am convinced that going through a dark valley does not make you a bad person, it does not make you a sinner, it does not make you any less of a Christian. It makes you stronger if you hold on to Jesus the Author and Finisher of my faith.
"Won't Back Down"
I grew up in a Seventh Day Adventist Family. My parents became Christians when I was very young. Going from weed smoking, drinking, partying lifestyles God saved our family. I am so grateful for the love, the nurture, the admonition and care of my godly parents. Without them I would not be who I am today.God saved my family from the pit of despair and bondage. I have no doubt in my mind that being a follower of Christ is what I am meant to be.
I have been a student missionary, I have been on several out of the countries short mission trips, I have held positions in the church, yet in spite of all of this I struggle. I struggle with forgiveness, I struggle with hate, I stuggle with with myself.
Several years ago my family started working with a self supporting ministry in our Church. Growing up I had very high ideals of this place. I grew up going there and the people seemed almost like saints. When I was given the opportunity to work there I was beyond happy! It seemed so wonderful. Little by little though the raw truth starting to sink in, there were huge problems with the leadership, issues being swept under the rug, myself and others were sexually harrased, workers being treated with little respect and an overal feeling that this place was farther from sainthood than I had originally had anticipated. Then my family, as other families had before us,began being treated really bad. I could not understand how people of my own church, my own religion could act as if they were not Christians. My whole family came under attack. During that time we were going through a possible cancer scare with my Mom and had little emotional support.
Eventually things worsened and my Dad was fired. My brothers had previously left working there with a bitter taste of Christianity in their mouths. After being severally mistreated over my being sexually harrased and seeing how my Dad was unfaily treated I left as well. I can't begin to tell you the bitterness and hatred that started to work its way in my heart. I wanted revenge, I hated, I hurt.
I have had to little by little give the hurt, the pain, the hatred to Christ. I cannot do it on my own. I could feel my heart grow bitter and hateful and I did not want to turn into that. It has been a few years now and the pain has lessend and with time but it is still there. I still struggle with hatred and pain but with Christ's help I keep surrendering it.
During that time some other personal things happened that brought pain to my family as well. Due to the nature of them I cannot share but it was another arrow to our hearts.
Just recently my my family had another loss. My parents foster/adopt and a baby we have had for the past 2 1/2 years was just recently returned to her birth Mom. Caring for that baby had been our highlight during the dark times of tribulation we experienced and now she too is gone.
My heart aches to write all of this but I have determined in my heart that I will not loose my hold, my trust, my anchor to Christ. He has been my all in all and the light at the end of the tunnel. Some moments I have to take them second by second but with His grace He is helping me through the trials and dark valleys of this life.
I am convinced that going through a dark valley does not make you a bad person, it does not make you a sinner, it does not make you any less of a Christian. It makes you stronger if you hold on to Jesus the Author and Finisher of my faith.
"Won't Back Down"
You woke the morning up
Running off my darkest night
The longest fight I've seen
And here goes a chance I know
Cashing in on all my chips
Let all my ships come fly
These days, a little bit longer than the last
And all of these ways, a little bit stronger than the past
And your light, found my bottle in the night
Gave me second life, you kept me in this fight
And I won't back down
I won't turn around and around
And I won't back down
Doesn't matter what comes crashing down
I'm still gonna stand on solid ground
And you found me once and for all
I laid it down in the sinking ground
The hopeless undertow
Singing out the gentle sound
Rattling through my smoking screens
My broken dreams last night
And these days, a little bit longer than the last
And all of these ways, a little bit stronger than the past
And all of your light, found my bottle in the night
You kept in this fight, you gave me second life
And I won't back down
I won't turn around and around
And I won't back down
Doesn't matter what comes crashing down
I'm still gonna stand on solid ground
And I sing hallelujah ripped through my veins
I heard the hammer drop
My blood in the rain
Sing hallelujah came like a train
When all is lost, all is left to gain
I won't back down
And I won't turn around and around
And I won't back down
Doesn't matter what comes crashing down
I'm still gonna stand on solid
And I won't back down
And I won't turn around and around
And I won't back down
Doesn't matter what comes crashing down
I'm still gonna stand on solid ground
Hallelujah...
Hallelujah...
Hallelujah...
Sing Hallelujah...
Sing Hallelujah...
Running off my darkest night
The longest fight I've seen
And here goes a chance I know
Cashing in on all my chips
Let all my ships come fly
These days, a little bit longer than the last
And all of these ways, a little bit stronger than the past
And your light, found my bottle in the night
Gave me second life, you kept me in this fight
And I won't back down
I won't turn around and around
And I won't back down
Doesn't matter what comes crashing down
I'm still gonna stand on solid ground
And you found me once and for all
I laid it down in the sinking ground
The hopeless undertow
Singing out the gentle sound
Rattling through my smoking screens
My broken dreams last night
And these days, a little bit longer than the last
And all of these ways, a little bit stronger than the past
And all of your light, found my bottle in the night
You kept in this fight, you gave me second life
And I won't back down
I won't turn around and around
And I won't back down
Doesn't matter what comes crashing down
I'm still gonna stand on solid ground
And I sing hallelujah ripped through my veins
I heard the hammer drop
My blood in the rain
Sing hallelujah came like a train
When all is lost, all is left to gain
I won't back down
And I won't turn around and around
And I won't back down
Doesn't matter what comes crashing down
I'm still gonna stand on solid
And I won't back down
And I won't turn around and around
And I won't back down
Doesn't matter what comes crashing down
I'm still gonna stand on solid ground
Hallelujah...
Hallelujah...
Hallelujah...
Sing Hallelujah...
Sing Hallelujah...
"Mat Kearney"
Sunday, June 03, 2012
Walking Worthy of You
Have you ever found in your life as a Christian that there are mountain top experiences as well as desert times? I have found that true in my own life and as I find myself in the desert place right now it is easy to start filling my life with worldy thoughts, worldy desires, worldy entertainment. We live in this world yet as Christ tells us in Romans 12:2, "And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the reneewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God."
I watched a short devotional on mission service this morning and as the presenter spoke he challenged me . Am I looking right in front of me or am I looking at what God wants? In life we all get so busy that sometimes, more often than we like, we get into an ant mentality. We see only what is right in front of us while God sees the whole picture. Am I letting earthly things consume me while forgetting God's will and His desire for my life?
If you feel like you are in a desert place or in a state of spiritual lethargy open the Bible. Even if you don't feel like it, open the Bible. Get out a notebook and pen and start writing down some prayer requests, take time to focus your mind on others and on God and let God start chipping away at your heart. That is what I am doing and why I feel compelled to share my experience. I opened up to Colossians chapter 1 this morning and here is what I found that really inspired me:
"That you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; strengthened with all might according to His glorious power, for all patience and longsuffering with joy; giving thanks to the Father who has qualified us to be partakers of the inheritance of the saints in the light. He has delivered us from the power of darkness and conveyed us into the kingdom of the Son of His love." Colossians 1:10-13
"..How high the ideal that these words hold before the follower of Christ! They show the wonderful possibillities of the Christian life and make it plain that there is not limit to the blessings that the children of God may recieve." AA 471
Dear Father, Help me to walk worthy of You and help me to start seeing this life from Your perspective and not mine. Amen
I watched a short devotional on mission service this morning and as the presenter spoke he challenged me . Am I looking right in front of me or am I looking at what God wants? In life we all get so busy that sometimes, more often than we like, we get into an ant mentality. We see only what is right in front of us while God sees the whole picture. Am I letting earthly things consume me while forgetting God's will and His desire for my life?
If you feel like you are in a desert place or in a state of spiritual lethargy open the Bible. Even if you don't feel like it, open the Bible. Get out a notebook and pen and start writing down some prayer requests, take time to focus your mind on others and on God and let God start chipping away at your heart. That is what I am doing and why I feel compelled to share my experience. I opened up to Colossians chapter 1 this morning and here is what I found that really inspired me:
"That you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; strengthened with all might according to His glorious power, for all patience and longsuffering with joy; giving thanks to the Father who has qualified us to be partakers of the inheritance of the saints in the light. He has delivered us from the power of darkness and conveyed us into the kingdom of the Son of His love." Colossians 1:10-13
"..How high the ideal that these words hold before the follower of Christ! They show the wonderful possibillities of the Christian life and make it plain that there is not limit to the blessings that the children of God may recieve." AA 471
Dear Father, Help me to walk worthy of You and help me to start seeing this life from Your perspective and not mine. Amen
Friday, April 13, 2012
Change This Heart
I've been trying to run away from this false reality
no matter where I turn my back you're always right in front of me
so I push you away, but I don't know that I'm wrong
I don't know the words to say to make my faith that strong
So I will pray to you right now
to take away my sin
heal away my brokenness
and change this heart again
Without you I am nothing
but a weak and dying man
so I will pray to you right now
and change this heart again
What is going through the motions
if my life is still the same
everyday's the same old puzzle
all the pieces re-arranged
and I refuse your help
out of my own selfish pride
lord I have so many masks
to cover up and hide
So I will pray to you right now
to take away my sin
come heal away my brokenness
and change this heart again
without you I am nothing
but a weak and a dying man
So I will pray to you right now
come change this heart again
So I will pray to you my Lord
to change this heart again
~ Sang by: Sidewalk Prophets
no matter where I turn my back you're always right in front of me
so I push you away, but I don't know that I'm wrong
I don't know the words to say to make my faith that strong
So I will pray to you right now
to take away my sin
heal away my brokenness
and change this heart again
Without you I am nothing
but a weak and dying man
so I will pray to you right now
and change this heart again
What is going through the motions
if my life is still the same
everyday's the same old puzzle
all the pieces re-arranged
and I refuse your help
out of my own selfish pride
lord I have so many masks
to cover up and hide
So I will pray to you right now
to take away my sin
come heal away my brokenness
and change this heart again
without you I am nothing
but a weak and a dying man
So I will pray to you right now
come change this heart again
So I will pray to you my Lord
to change this heart again
~ Sang by: Sidewalk Prophets
Saturday, March 24, 2012
Monday, March 19, 2012
Thursday, March 15, 2012
Thursday, January 19, 2012
Studying
Well, I am back to school now! I am exhausted from my classes all day yesterday but it feels good to be back in the middle of studying again. I can't wait, I am half way done with my Associates of Arts in Elementary Education with my minor in English! Whew....that was a mouthful! My thought for today is to encourage everyone to expand your mind and step out of your comfort zone. Do something challenging! It is good for your brain! :)
Friday, January 13, 2012
Happy Sabbath!
I couldn't believe I have not posted on here in SOOOO LONG! WOW! Where is time going? Just wanted to say Happy Sabbath and if anyone is still actually checking up on this poor neglected blog I hope to add more this year then last! :) Blessings!!